In celebration of my 30th birthday, I wanted to share with you all 30 lessons I’ve learned in 30 years of life.
I created an entire podcast episode all about this topic, but it’s so important that I wanted to provide a written version too.
(Did you know I do a lot of podcast work? Check out this page to see all of my podcast projects!)
There has been a lot of wisdom accumulated from so many different sources and life experiences during these 30 years. With a few decades under my belt and an eagerness to learn, I’m truly in awe of how much life teaches you over the years.
Maybe there will be a lesson here that will resonate with you. Maybe it will completely apply to a journey you’re going through right now. You never know when a shared perspective can help you along the way.
So let’s jump right in!
Listen to the Podcast Episode on Apple Podcasts or Spotify:
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Read the Podcast Transcript:
1. Always question why you believe something.
Really determine if this belief is supporting your highest good and the highest good of all. I’ve spent a lot of my time, especially recently, reflecting on why I believe the things that I believe. I’ve noticed a lot of those beliefs were actually hindering me versus helping me. Keeping an open mind about that has made the world of a difference.
2. Friendships need a foundation to survive and space to thrive.
I’ve noticed that my best friendships are the ones where we are not 100% dependent on knowing what each other is doing every second of the day. We give each other space to go live our lives and we know when we come back and reunite, we’ll pick up exactly where we left off. We’re supporting each other, we’re in each other’s corner, and the love is always gonna be there no matter where we are physically or how often we communicate.
Also, my friendships that have the deepest connections are ones where we can talk about those heart-centered topics that have meaning, self-discovery, and more resonance with the bigger picture. Those friends truly feel like soulmates and there’s so much longevity and that type of friendship.
3. Everyone is on their own life path.
No two life journeys are the same. So instead of pining after someone else’s, go inwards and start creating your own. I think when I realized this, I felt free because I often was comparing myself (as many people do) to other people’s journeys and feeling empty in my own.
But once I started going inward and building my own life from the inside out, I felt so much more fulfilled and like I could do anything. Truthfully, what other people are doing is pretty irrelevant, however, it could also be a source of inspiration! (as long as I don’t take it as the “only way to do things”)
Look at it this way – my own path is always going to be more suited and more aligned for me personally than anyone else’s ever could be.
4. Nervous system regulation is everything.
During my health journey, I learned a lot about the difference between being in the sympathetic versus parasympathetic state, which is fight or flight versus rest and digest mode. I realized that the reason a lot of my symptoms were so chronic was because I was stuck in fight or flight mode.
I had some beliefs that my body was fighting against me. Being in my body straight up felt scary because it felt like all of my internal alarm systems were turned on!
So once I started taking on practices that regulated my nervous system, I noticed a huge shift in my overall healing, my thoughts, my mental health, and in my overall enjoyment of life as well. So nervous system regulation key.
Faith Ashenden’s teachings absolutely changed the way that I look at everything in case you want to check out her work at That Healing Feeling.
5. Detaching from the outcome leads to so much more inner peace, as well as a Result that is for the highest good of all involved.
Whenever I am outcome dependent, I think I am a lot more miserable than I would be if I just let things unfold naturally. I’ve noticed that it’s my expectations that cause more disappointment than the actual reality of what’s occurring.
When I can detach from the outcome and know that I will be okay either way, oftentimes it ends up working out: 1. Just fine or 2. It works out better or 3. Even if it doesn’t feel better in the moment, it is actually for the best in the long run. (which is ultimately confirmed by hindsight)
6. You can accept things the way that they are, even if they’re not ideal right at this moment.
There’s always the possibility that things can change for the better, but being able to accept whatever is happening in the now frees you from needing things to be a certain way to be content and happy in your present moment.
7. Every single delay, pivot, or setback is FOR you.
It’s not happening to you, it’s happening for you. In the grand scheme, the universe is always on your side and things are working out for your highest good – even when it doesn’t seem like that.
When you can really trust these delays and pivots, you’re going to have a lot more of an enjoyable journey.
8. Partnering with your ego instead of resisting it, being asleep to it, or hating it is going to change your life.
Our egos are like wounded children. They want to be seen, heard and acknowledged.
I learned this concept from Kathrin Zenkina. A lot of times we scorn our egos because we are ashamed of what they have to say, but ultimately their job is to protect us. They’re trying to help us survive.
When we’re able to observe our ego and tell it “thank you for bringing this to my attention, I’ll take care of it now,” that can give the ego space to be heard and seen. And you can work with your higher self to make the appropriate changes.
Again, the ego is simply the wounded child part of us. It’s not who we are. Our thoughts are not who we are. But we have the power to have the consciousness to choose how we want to direct those thoughts, feelings, and energy.
9. What you resist persists.
I learned this from my Manifesting coach, Amy Westmoreland. It is one of the first things she ever taught me and it stuck with me to this day. This is the example she uses: It’s like when you put on one of those Chinese finger traps. If you are pulling it and pulling it, it just gets tighter on your fingers.
Once you relax and stop giving it so much resistance, the Chinese finger trap loosens and you’re able to slide it off your fingers with ease.
So if you think about that with life, when you are resisting something, it causes you so much more pain and tightness and contraction. Whereas if you can again observe it, allow it to happen, and just let it be, things typically work out so much better. Even if it’s uncomfortable in the moment!
10. It’s absolutely worth it to invest in yourself, especially when it comes to your health.
You definitely need to tune into your intuition when you are making investments like this to make sure that it’s aligned with your goals and your highest good. But you know that feeling when something is really going to support you.
I like to view money as an exchange of energy. So I am exchanging this currency of energy to receive greater value for my investment.
From my personal experience, there is nothing more important than your health. Not only is it more expensive to take care of your health retroactively, but you also are needing to exchange your time and the quality of your day-to-day life the longer you go.
But also, from a non-health perspective, if you’re making an investment in your business, in your personal development, or your mental health – sometimes it can be scary to take the jump. But in the long run, if it is enhancing and bettering your quality of life, it is absolutely worth it.
11. External validation, accomplishments, and material items do not mean as much as you think.
Some people would argue they literally mean nothing. Of course, they’re really nice to have, but you don’t get any bonus points in the game of life when you have these things.
You don’t need external validation, accomplishments, or flashy material items – and they’re not where true contentment and fulfillment actually live. (even though that’s what society wants us to think.)
12. Time and money are people’s two biggest excuses why they can’t live their dreams.
If that’s something that affects you, maybe tune in and see if there’s a way that you can reframe this. If it’s something that you truly, genuinely want – life is too short to not go after your dreams.
13. We are extensions of the creative source that created us.
Think about that. We are extensions of the Universe/God/Source Energy in human form. Therefore we are each powerful creators with creative power within us.
That one blows my mind.
14. Anything is possible & we live in a limitless Universe
We are limitless beings with unlimited potential. Don’t you forget that.
15. You are allowed to want or do things just for the hell of it or just because it sounds fun.
You don’t need to justify how or why you’re doing something.
16. Your life purpose doesn’t have to be deeper than the fact that you simply come to planet Earth to have fun.
You don’t need to become a world-famous surgeon or win a Nobel Peace Prize or be the founder of a seven or eight-figure business to live a fulfilling life.
You can just come here to have fun, to enjoy the experiences of the five senses, to love the people that you have in your life… to just “be.”
We are human beings, not human doings.
You don’t have to be “doing” things for your existence to have worth.
Being worthy or being deserving of something is not even a real thing. There is no checklist that determines whether or not you are worthy or deserving of anything. So therefore they are not even real. They’re manmade concepts that we created to sell ourselves short.
But the fact is, if you are existing right now as you are, you are inherently worthy of absolutely anything and everything. There are no exceptions to that and there is no one person who is better or worse than another person. We are all on the exact same level no matter what we do or what we have accomplished. Frankly, it just does not matter.
What does matter is if you find joy, if you have peace, if you feel love – all of those intangible things are really what make up life and make it worth living.
17. The “how” is not your job.
You don’t need to figure out “how” things are going to happen. This was the biggest trap I ever fell into and it caused me endless hours of anxiety.
We can’t predict the structure of how things are going to unfold. Yes, we can have a plan. Yes, we can have goals. However, the way that things actually unfold, if you actually look back on your life, is never in the order of what you thought.
The Universe is going to figure out the how. That’s the Universe’s job. Again, here’s another Katherine Zenkina-ism, but she said the “how, who, and when” are the Universe’s job, and the “what and why” are your job.
So get clear on what you want and why you want it. Set your intention and let it go. Take your inspired action and let the universe bring it to you. The how is not your job.
18. There is no future and there is no past besides what exists in your mind.
The only thing that we have is right now. The Power of Now by Eckert Tolle really secured this one in my brain. We literally have nothing except for what’s happening right in front of us.
So much of our suffering is caused by the thoughts of keeping the past alive or trying to create the future before it’s actually happening. Whenever we go off into those mind spirals, if we can come back into this present moment and check in with our five senses, check in with what’s really going on right now, and realize that ultimately we are safe in the now, we will feel so much more peace.
19. The things that lit you up as a child often have hints of your greater life’s purpose or simply things that can bring you fulfillment as an adult.
So maybe you really loved playing with animals when you were a kid. Or maybe you really loved playing instruments or doing art, dancing, or any of those things.
We often forget as we grow older that those activities meant so much to us when we were younger and we found so much joy in them because we were really present with those activities. So if you’re going through a self-discovery journey as an adult, looking back to your early childhood and what brought you joy during that segment of life may have a few hints for you that could be helpful in your present-day.
20. Be open to alternatives.
Whether that is an alternative perspective, method, way of healing, or a different way of doing things than you ever thought.
There is no possible way that we can know everything. We are just one tiny speck of a human in a grand, gigantic universe that is like incomprehensible to the brain. There’s no way that we can know everything.
If there are alternative ways to do something, be open to them. There is so much knowledge, especially within different cultures that can be really, really impactful. If you can expand your mind and be open to something different than what you grew up with, you may find a key that has been existing the whole time but just was not in your immediate consciousness.
“The way things have always been done” may not be the only way to do things. Or even the most effective.
Being open-minded will not only give you the opportunity to practice more compassion and acceptance, but it will truly get you far.
21. The only way to truly heal something is to treat it from the root cause.
A band-aid solution is not going to work in the long run.
This applies to both physical and emotional healing. It often takes longer and more consistency, but the results last more long-term.
22. You are never going to make the “wrong” choice.
And in addition to that, I don’t think there is ever a “right” choice, either. There’s no such thing as right and wrong – everything is all perspective.
I think we have a perception that we’re going to get punished by the Universe if we make the “wrong” decision, but that’s simply just not true. The Universe is going to reroute you back to your highest timeline no matter what, and you just have to trust that.
So make decisions with no remorse. Choose the choice that feels intuitively most aligned with you and go with it. Once the decision’s made, we can’t look back. So know that it was the proper decision to make at that time, and you’re not going to get rewarded or punished either way. It just is what it is and it’s moving you forward on your life trajectory.
23. Your mind can create a lot of fear around something, but when you actually do it in real-time, it’s totally manageable and often amazing.
I’ll use this as an example for traveling internationally. I used to be really scared to travel internationally, especially as a kid. Even before we took off on our nomad journey, I got really nervous because I used to get a lot of homesickness. I even kind of struggled during my study abroad during college with being international and I was just scared about doing it again.
My mind ended up going into overdrive and thinking of all these scenarios and kind of creating a lot of fear within myself. But I knew that it was my dream and sometimes you have to do things scared.
So I did. And once I got there, you realize it’s the same planet. Everybody’s still walking on two feet, everyone’s still going to the grocery store. Yes, things are different, and yes, you have to figure things out, but once you’re in the moment and you are put in a place where you can figure those things out, you just do it. You take one thing at a time.
So do things scared, it’ll be worth it.
24. Things in life typically come from a place of fear or love.
The biggest life hack is to simply be conscious of this when we are interacting with other people and when other people are interacting with us.
And we all know the difference, right?
When we’re coming from a space of love, we are giving generously from our hearts. We are showing up with our best intentions and our best foot forward. And ultimately those situations work out better, no matter the outcome. At least you know you were coming from a space of pure love.
Whereas coming from fear can often have the opposite. And because of the law of cause and effect, there are often consequences for showing up from a space of fear. However, they are also opportunities to learn for the next time.
25. We live in an abundant universe.
You can see examples of this everywhere: whether it be hairs on your head, grains of sand on the beach, stars in the sky, or ants on an ant hill. We are surrounded by abundance at all times and we forget about it because we are often focused on the lack of something.
But if you can tune into the frequency of abundance and this truth, you’ll start noticing abundance absolutely everywhere in your life.
26. Healing your relationship with money is one of the most freeing things you can do.
We are raised in society, by our parents, etc. to believe that there is never enough money. We get stuck in the feeling of lack and scarcity.
However, as I just mentioned, we live in an abundant universe and money falls under that umbrella. You can see evidence of money everywhere. It is just energy.
So when you can shift your perspective and start opening up to abundance, money can start flowing to you more freely. Again, be detached from the outcome. Even if you can only shift your internal world, you will feel so much more at peace.
This is a gigantic conversation – People create entire courses, write books, and host seminars on the topic. But I can give you the resource of my favorite book, A Happy Pocket Full of Money. If you’re looking to heal your relationship with money, that’s a great place to start.
27. Two things can be true at one time.
So if you feel happy and sad at the same time, both of those things can be true.
If you love your home but you love to travel, both of those things can be true.
If you love your life, feel so appreciative, and have so much gratitude for things and still experience sadness and anxiety, both of those things can be true. And it is okay.
We are complex, multifaceted human beings – not robots with a one-track mind. Many things can be true at one time.
Even if you have the perspective “it could always be worse” or “other people have it worse than me, my situation isn’t that bad so I shouldn’t feel this way” – please remember, that comparison isn’t helping you heal. Your feelings about your life situation are completely valid. Give yourself some extra love and compassion.
28. Trust your timeline.
The way that things are unfolding in your life is like a domino effect. They happen at the exact perfect time to create the ultimate highest good for yourself, your soul, and for everyone who comes into contact with you.
When an artist is sewing a tapestry or painting a picture, you can’t see the end result until it’s done, right? So every stroke of paint or every thread in the tapestry is like little events in your life all adding up to the masterpiece.
The universe is the artist and it is always on your side. It’s goal is to create the most beautiful masterpiece possible, and you just have to trust in the process.
Wherever you are at any given point in time is exactly the perfect place for you to be because it’s all contributing to your greater life journey.
29. Rejection is a Redirection.
Another really great and comforting phrase. This one helped me a lot during my dating days. (This phrase is from the book Love Will Find You – HIGHLY recommend this book if you’re ready to call in your soulmate)
I used to take rejections very, very personally. And I ultimately realized it was because the Universe was closing doors to all the people that were not meant for me. It was never really about who I was or my value as a good person or partner – it never had anything to do with that.
All of these “closed doors” were leading me to something that ultimately was meant for me. I just couldn’t see it yet because, as much as I thought I was, I wasn’t ready to receive it yet.
So whether that has to do with dating, whether it has to do with a job or a house or anything, just know that rejection is truly a redirection. You are being redirected to your highest timeline and to all the things that are truly meant for you.
30. Forcing, wanting, hoping, longing, and desperation have a very, very different feel than accepting, receiving, trusting, and being in true alignment.
In every situation you face, tune into the underlying energy of the situation. Because you have the power to choose where your energy and focus reside.
31. BONUS – The way people treat you is not about you – it’s about something that’s going on within them.
This one wasn’t mentioned in the podcast episode, but like an extra candle for good luck on a birthday cake, I wanted to add one extra nugget to the blog post. Plus, I think this one is really important.
The majority of the population has gone through life experiences with a lack of healing tools for the difficulties we face in this game of life. They may still be carrying around childhood traumas or beliefs that are not serving them, and therefore projecting that underlying hurt in unrelated situations come across.
Aka the phrase “hurt people hurt people.”
Remember that there is no such thing as an ultimate “truth” – only point of views, judgments, conclusions, or beliefs. What someone says about you is not true unless you decide that it is.
So if you find yourself in a situation that leaves you feeling triggered, remember that 1. That person is most likely going through their own pain and taking it out on whoever is in front of them at that moment. 2. If something they said really bothers you, get curious about that! Keep things neutral and use it as an opportunity to heal something within yourself. Maybe you’ll learn a lesson that you’ll be able to add to your own “30 Nuggets of Wisdom” list.
That’s All For Now!
Alright, that is the end! I hope that you guys enjoyed all of these little nuggets of wisdom. I had so much reflecting on what I’ve learned, and it’s so funny because I could have done so many more! That really goes to show that you can learn so much in just a matter of years.
It’s amazing how much growth we can go through, especially when we’re open to it, actively learning about it, and tuning in. If these perspectives simply make life more manageable and enjoyable to go through, that’s truly all that matters!
Thank you so much for being here! I am so excited to be in this new decade – in the 30’s Club! It’s an honor to be here. It means I’m still alive and breathing and healthy, and that is the biggest gift that anyone can ever receive.
So have a wonderful day! Take this wisdom into your everyday life and apply it wherever necessary. Be open to the new lessons coming your way. And feel free to re-read this blog post or re-listen to The Pod Episode anytime you ever need a little boost of inspiration.
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